AL DAVIS’ ONGOING COMMITMENT TO EXCREMENT


Sit the fuck down old dude. We aren’t in awe of you or your team. Haven’t been in decades. That’s how long ago it was we wore, yes we admit it, a Raiders jacket. It had thick vinyl sleeves that were great for diving on the cement when playing slaughterball at recess. That was when we jumped from team to team like we later would women depending on who was the hottest.

Dolphins. Steelers. Cowboys. Then you guys.

That insecurity ended when Cliff Olander and our Chargers kicked your ass 12-7 in ’77, and we almost wept watching the Murph rock on NBC as the clock ticked down.

With the Holy Roller we learned to loathe you.

But we’re way over that. All growed up we’ve acquired a mustard seed’s worth of empathy for the infirm. Not to mention the Niners are much more fun to eviscerate. So we can only go so far in saluting your shitfest. We used to say a super season in San Diego would be going 2-14 but beating you guys.

Now a win is so automatic we don’t even know when you’re on the schedule.

Like when Wayne Valley was alive.

YOU’RE SO VAIN-CARLY SIMON

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7 Responses to AL DAVIS’ ONGOING COMMITMENT TO EXCREMENT

  1. Raidersman says:

    Fair weather fan, no loyalty, no substance, when was the last time the Chargers won a Superbowl?

    • drowningboy says:

      33 seasons of rooting for the Chargers is hardly “fair-weather”.

      One year of rooting for the turds proves I was ten.

      Then I grew up.

      • raidersman says:

        Go to comicon, hang out in the gas lamp, stay in diego, enjoy another failed attempt at the post season, you can bash the raiders all you want, but you still can’t answer, when was the last time you guys won the big game??? Or even made an appearance? How many hall-of-famers do you have? Hoy many division titles do you have?

      • drowningboy says:

        Dying without winning an SB is far better than living as a turd fan.

        And about those division titles and HOF’s. Do some research.

        Like look at last year’s standings.

        And the year before.

        And the year before that.

        And the year…

  2. Raidersman says:

    Again, how many Superbowl titles do you guys have?

    • drowningboy says:

      That’s NOT what you asked earlier. You specifically said in Spanglish?:

      “Hoy many division titles do you have?”

      Didn’t like the truth?

  3. Raidersman says:

    The Raiders have defeated the Chargers 54 times and the Chargers have defeated the Raiders 44 times. The Raiders have won 3 Superbowls, the Chargers have won ZERO Superbowls. Just some facts for your uneducated ass. The Raiders have a .500 or better record against 24 of 31 teams in the National Football League.

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